:: eLise is me ::: April 2006

Saturday, April 29, 2006

La vie est Belle <>

Great. Just great.

He went to Europe without telling me.

Only called me when he reached.

Great. Just great.

Friday, April 28, 2006

La vie est Belle <>

For the sake of the fruits. (yeah right)

Decided to just stop picking bones outta shells and stick my guts to the job.

It's just another 2 months of boring shits darling. You can do it!
*pat myself on the back*

Shouldn't complain too much ya know. DBS is so nice as to provide fruits everyday. So on account of them being so nice, and with such superb colleagues (treats of tiramisu, dessert, drinks), I shall just stay.

Man! I'm just a glut!

LOL!

Anyway, msn-ed Farhana the other day saying something to the effect of:
"When I do IPP also got fruits from the office, and now DBS too. I'm so lucky. Haha. Next time when I go interview, must ask them if they provide fruits. If they don't, then don't work for them."

It's evident that I'm nuts.

Nuff said.

Thursday, April 27, 2006

La vie est Belle <>

Where is it?!

I totally forgotten where I left my IKEA 2006 catalogue.

And I'm going nuts over searching for it up and down.

I keep saying out loud:
"IKEA! Where are you?!"

And my brother stared at me like I'm crazy.

I'm not crazy.

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

La vie est Belle <>

Postpone.

Alrighty. I'll be starting my Rebirth program this coming Monday instead.

Cos being the picky and weirdo me, a Monday that is the start of a new month seems too good a sign for me. I just can't resist!

So this coming Monday, 1st of May, will be the start of my 1 month program to change my total well-being.

Goody goody. I'll have a few more days to get myself more prepared.

Can't wait! It's so very exciting! Hee!

Dear Farhana, I'll let you know about the outcome in 1 month's time alrighty. Missing you & Cheryl loads!

Monday, April 24, 2006

La vie est Belle <>

Frustrated.

Today a temp girl over here announced that she's leaving. She's in the same project as me and joined DBS 1 month before me.

Coincidently, I was planning to announce my tender today. Cos I calculated that it'll be the best timing as if I'm to tender today, my last day will be this coming friday and I can then concentrate more on my program.

But one hell of a NO way cos she announced it earlier than me and when I got wind of it, I started getting really piss with myself. And then the whole world.

Oh well, you know me. I'm like that.

Well, being the overly nice and freaking way too considerate person I am, I started to empathize with DBS thinking that having 2 old birds leaving out of the total 3 will be abit tough for them cos it's gonna be difficult to get the project on pace with 2 new birds and 1 old bird.

And so I started to throw tantrum and nearly cried. At my own weakness and failure of not being able to be a total hardhearted bitch.

And so there you go my friends. You now have an extremely upset and irritated Elise.

WHEN THE HELL CAN I LEAVE?!

Sunday, April 23, 2006

La vie est Belle <>

Project Rebirth.

As of tomorrow, 24th April 2006, Monday, I'll be going on a 30 day rebirth program.

It will be a grueling 30 days test of my endurance, determination and willpower.

So to those who wishes to support me, the greatest support you can ever give is to refrain from asking me out till 23th May 2006, Tuesday.

I'll still be blogging though. Telling you guys what's happening and stuff.

Thanks and love ya'll loads!

Saturday, April 22, 2006

La vie est Belle <>

It's my Life.

I came across this chinese article at work which is about people wasting their lives away in waiting.
"Shen Ming Zai Deng Dai Zhong Xiao Shi".

It talks about how the westerners are more on their feet while asians are more on their butt.

What I'm trying to say is that the westerners will just go ahead and do what they wanna do while we asians tend to think too much about things and often ended up not doing anything and simply waiting for the "right moment".

The example given in the article is of 2 men. Let's call them John & Ming.

Both John & Ming worked in the same company, the same position, the same salary, but not knowing each other. Both had the same dream; to live a better live. Both had in mind to get their dream house as a kick-start to their better lives; by living comfortably.

John got his dream house within a few years by paying in instalments while Ming is trying to save up the whole sum as he doesn't want to be burdened by the debts of instalments. Thus Ming lived a life of scrimping and saving.

Ming finally bought his dream house 20 years down the road and became neigbour with John.

But then tragedy strikes. Ming is found to be in ill health due to malnutrition for the past 20 years due to his severe scrimping and saving. Eventually, he died.

Ming could have achieved his dream house and better live 20 years ago but instead he chose to wait.

I was deeply stirred by this article. Because I am exactly like Ming. I think too much into everything and ended up with stress and worries and procrastination. My life is indeed being wasted while in waiting. I am forever on the lookout and wait for the "right moment".

But then again, can anyone define the right moment?

No.

Its in the same week as when I saw the article that my Dad said something almost similar to me.

"Why worry about things that has not even happen?"

My personal mentor said the same thing to me last year.

This is just too much.

There's already so many signs telling me to stop whatever I'm doing now and to re-focus myself.
And I'm gonna do just that.

Recently I keep worrying and thinking about my studies. Should I accept JCU and take on a whole new life or should I stick to what I'm doing now but dislike, finance.

In case you people don't know this, but I'm being accepted by JCU to take on Bachelor in Psychology.

I keep worrying about not being able to get to my Masters and if that comes, I'll never be able to get a job. Cos in order to practice in Singapore and Australia, you need a Masters and a Doctorate for USA. I told my Dad about this and he shot me back with the sentence above.

And then that article came along.

I don't deny that I am drawn to the fame and riches of the financial industry. I am overwhelmed when walking along Raffles where all the tall buildings of the financial sector are. And finance is something I know. And I know I have the ability to make it big.

But how many years will I have to slog then? There are so many people out there doing the same thing and competitions are everywhere. I aren't afraid of the competition. I'm just not willing to step into this rat race. I got the term rat race from reading "Rich Dad, Poor Dad".

I'm not willing to end up like everyone else. Slogging their guts out and looking like shit due to all the lack of sleep. Dipping into depression or breakdowns due to all the stress. And then there's the office politics.

I listen to my friends who choose to step into the rat race complain daily about how different it is. How tough it is. How much office politics there are. How fake everyone is.
And I'm starting to get sick of it. Sometimes I just feel like asking them to shut up and just accept all that cos they themselves chose it. But then I didn't cos I know I complain too.

And this is when I know I'm still not up to it for the rat race.

I don't deny the fact that I'm scared of accepting JCU cos Pyschology is something I know little about. It's something new. I choose it based on purely my instinct. My interest. My like for it.

And honestly, if I am to act and follow my heart, I will accept JCU's offer immediately. Cos my heart isn't at finance. I strongly believe that you have to choose something you like to do in order to be happy.
I can just imagine myself complain daily like my rat race friends for the next 30 years down the road if I choose finance.

There are people who shot me back by saying: "What makes you sure that your life in social science will not be another rat race? Everything is the same everywhere."

To these friends, I appreciate and understands what they're driving at. But honestly, I'm positive about things. I'm not as pessimistic. And anyway, I choose what I choose. So I am ready to bear the consequences.

I have already painted a picture of what life I hope to achieve in future, and I am ready to work towards it. I believe I can do it. There are people out there doubting me and seeing that I cannot make it. But that only fuels me to work even harder to prove them wrong. So if you're planning to put me down, go ahead. I appreciate those encouragements. I really do.

And so to sum it up, I'm going for what I like. And I hope that in the years to come, I will end up loving it. Loving what I choose to do. For when that time comes, I'll be like John.

And so now, one of those "life tests" is starting soon for me. Bring it on baby!

Thursday, April 20, 2006

La vie est Belle <>

Damn you.

Work was hell today. Had to rush like crazy and now the only thing I get is an extremely achy left shoulder.

I did a couple of company files and nearly couldn't reach the quota. Spent the entire morning completing only 6 company files. So imagine how many documents there are in each file. All the Memorandum and Articles of Association, Directors' Resolution, mandatees, blah blah blah. It's all so CAA. Well at least it goes to show that what I learnt in school is at least useful!

Was so pissed. I spent like 30 minutes per company file and when I'm finally done with them, I had to rush the individual files. Curses!
But know what? I rushed at such speed that usually it takes 15 minutes per individual files and today, my record was 5 minutes.

5 minutes!

WAHAHA! Feeling damn proud now.

Anyway, out of the blue, I received a sms.

"Hi baby. Did you sms me last night? Deleted by mistake. Pls re send."

And then my mood got worse and I started cursing the scanner.

Poor scanner.

Thou shall never ever sms you again! That's for deleting my sms by mistake and taking more than 12 hours to reply! HAH!

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

La vie est Belle <>

Work.

Work is such a bore and yet such a bitch at times.

I'm doing repetitive stuff everyday so it's so boring to the extent that I can let my mind wander away while doing my job and still get things right.
So I actually got to think about lots of things recently and getting into more of my "thought-provoking-moments".
Or simply thinking of silly things that makes me smile. Heehee.

But when work becomes a bitch, I get aching shoulders and bad mood. Damn it.
My left shoulder hurts like crazy!
Someone give me a massage!

I SO SO regretted getting a job man.

Should have just stuck to my guts and spend my days at the library reading and getting more knowledge, shopping, swimming, working out, pilates sessions, learn cooking, play games and watch tv.

DAMN!

Can't I just quit? I'll forgo 1 week's pay!

I don't care about the money anymore. I want my freedom back!

Saturday, April 15, 2006

La vie est Belle <>

He's 35 and working in the management level of a company. He got his Bachelor degree from England, Masters from London, and is currently pursuing his Doctorate. He drives a car and lives in a Condominium in Holland. He doesn't smokes.

He's everything I ever wanted. Intelligent, mature, successful, healthy, and likes me alot.

But something in me keeps telling me that he just isn't the one.

And so I turned him down. Turned down his proposal.

So there goes a good catch.

But oh well, at least I followed my heart.

Now I feel so much better.

Tony, I'm so sorry.

Friday, April 14, 2006

La vie est Belle <>

Good Friday indeed.

Went to town to meet Daniel but had to wait for him. But oh well, if it wasn't for having to wait for him, I wouldn't have saw Desmond. Haha!

Yippee! Was really happy to see Desmond. And he's wearing specs.

Anyway, had a great time with Daniel. We clicked really well. We literally chatted non-stop for the whole 3 hours.

Had dinner at Wisma's Ding Tai Feng and then we walked around the whole of town. Heeren, Cineleisure, Wheelock.

Oh, and I must mention my ice cream mudpie. It was from Big O Cafe at Wheelock Place and it's called "O! I ate it again". Its a mango tango & summer strawberry ice cream mudpie with a layer of mashmallows and gummy sweets in between the ice creams with a thin crust of oreo at the bottom and topped with strawberry sauce.
Yummylicious I tell you! Must try!

A great guy, a great dinner, a fabulous dessert, interesting chat topics, and seeing Desmond.

My oh my. What a Friday.

A good Good Friday indeed!

Saturday, April 08, 2006

La vie est Belle <>

Getting better and better.

Suddenly I realised that life has been getting better for me. And it doesn't just stops there. It's still getting better and better.

I'm feeling truly blessed and I really am. I appreciate all these wonders in my life.

All along, things have been on the good side for me. Other than the occasional jerks I met, wrong paths I took, wrong things I did, all else is well.

Back in secondary 4, I became wayward and only started studying for my 'O' Level one month before the exam, but I still managed to pass it and am eligible for finance course.

My results in poly ain that fab but I still managed to pass every semester, with only 1 supp paper in my year 1 semester 1. And in the end? I'm now an official poly graduate with a Diploma in Financial Services.

As for my family, they have never ever given up on me. Never. During my wayward years, they stood by me and talked to me, worried about me and such. I turned out fine in the end and am now a lady with my priorities set out straight and knowing exactly what I want in life.

I have a great Dad who endured all my nonsense, doted on me, picked me up, bought supper for me, plans my future for me, let me switch the channel when he's watching the telly, sponsors my shopping and even sponsors my driving lessons.

I have a fabulous Mum who helped pay my cellphone bill once in awhile when I'm short, gives me a loan without the thought of ever wanting me to repay it, cooks the best dishes, always there to share my ups & downs, and always leaving her doors open for me.

I have a fantastic gramp who cooked for me, took care of me, jokes with me, brings me to the doctor, and bought things for me.

I have 2 very great brothers, though they can be super irritating at times. Tolerate my craziness, get things for me, treat me to nice stuffs, and enduring my screaming and yelling.

I have super caring relatives who's always there for me to go to for advise, comfort, and encouragements. All my aunts, uncles and cousins!

I also have ultra cool friends. My beloved sistas from poly (farhana, cheryl, amanda & alexis), my bestie Kerlyn, and my babe Jess. There's also my very own IT genius CS, Ikea pal TL, Dr. NWH, exam kaki Mich and loads loads more.

Though life can be really mean to me at times, I can still count upon my lucky stars and blessings. Cos of all I had in life, I am who I am.

As for now, things are still getting better.
I've got a temporary job at DBS (thanks to mich!), and I've received my Letter of Offer from JCU.

With such wonders and miracles in my life, what else could I ask for?

Well, maybe a Prince Charming to top it off.

*Grinz*