:: eLise is me ::: It's my Life.

Saturday, April 22, 2006

La vie est Belle <>

It's my Life.

I came across this chinese article at work which is about people wasting their lives away in waiting.
"Shen Ming Zai Deng Dai Zhong Xiao Shi".

It talks about how the westerners are more on their feet while asians are more on their butt.

What I'm trying to say is that the westerners will just go ahead and do what they wanna do while we asians tend to think too much about things and often ended up not doing anything and simply waiting for the "right moment".

The example given in the article is of 2 men. Let's call them John & Ming.

Both John & Ming worked in the same company, the same position, the same salary, but not knowing each other. Both had the same dream; to live a better live. Both had in mind to get their dream house as a kick-start to their better lives; by living comfortably.

John got his dream house within a few years by paying in instalments while Ming is trying to save up the whole sum as he doesn't want to be burdened by the debts of instalments. Thus Ming lived a life of scrimping and saving.

Ming finally bought his dream house 20 years down the road and became neigbour with John.

But then tragedy strikes. Ming is found to be in ill health due to malnutrition for the past 20 years due to his severe scrimping and saving. Eventually, he died.

Ming could have achieved his dream house and better live 20 years ago but instead he chose to wait.

I was deeply stirred by this article. Because I am exactly like Ming. I think too much into everything and ended up with stress and worries and procrastination. My life is indeed being wasted while in waiting. I am forever on the lookout and wait for the "right moment".

But then again, can anyone define the right moment?

No.

Its in the same week as when I saw the article that my Dad said something almost similar to me.

"Why worry about things that has not even happen?"

My personal mentor said the same thing to me last year.

This is just too much.

There's already so many signs telling me to stop whatever I'm doing now and to re-focus myself.
And I'm gonna do just that.

Recently I keep worrying and thinking about my studies. Should I accept JCU and take on a whole new life or should I stick to what I'm doing now but dislike, finance.

In case you people don't know this, but I'm being accepted by JCU to take on Bachelor in Psychology.

I keep worrying about not being able to get to my Masters and if that comes, I'll never be able to get a job. Cos in order to practice in Singapore and Australia, you need a Masters and a Doctorate for USA. I told my Dad about this and he shot me back with the sentence above.

And then that article came along.

I don't deny that I am drawn to the fame and riches of the financial industry. I am overwhelmed when walking along Raffles where all the tall buildings of the financial sector are. And finance is something I know. And I know I have the ability to make it big.

But how many years will I have to slog then? There are so many people out there doing the same thing and competitions are everywhere. I aren't afraid of the competition. I'm just not willing to step into this rat race. I got the term rat race from reading "Rich Dad, Poor Dad".

I'm not willing to end up like everyone else. Slogging their guts out and looking like shit due to all the lack of sleep. Dipping into depression or breakdowns due to all the stress. And then there's the office politics.

I listen to my friends who choose to step into the rat race complain daily about how different it is. How tough it is. How much office politics there are. How fake everyone is.
And I'm starting to get sick of it. Sometimes I just feel like asking them to shut up and just accept all that cos they themselves chose it. But then I didn't cos I know I complain too.

And this is when I know I'm still not up to it for the rat race.

I don't deny the fact that I'm scared of accepting JCU cos Pyschology is something I know little about. It's something new. I choose it based on purely my instinct. My interest. My like for it.

And honestly, if I am to act and follow my heart, I will accept JCU's offer immediately. Cos my heart isn't at finance. I strongly believe that you have to choose something you like to do in order to be happy.
I can just imagine myself complain daily like my rat race friends for the next 30 years down the road if I choose finance.

There are people who shot me back by saying: "What makes you sure that your life in social science will not be another rat race? Everything is the same everywhere."

To these friends, I appreciate and understands what they're driving at. But honestly, I'm positive about things. I'm not as pessimistic. And anyway, I choose what I choose. So I am ready to bear the consequences.

I have already painted a picture of what life I hope to achieve in future, and I am ready to work towards it. I believe I can do it. There are people out there doubting me and seeing that I cannot make it. But that only fuels me to work even harder to prove them wrong. So if you're planning to put me down, go ahead. I appreciate those encouragements. I really do.

And so to sum it up, I'm going for what I like. And I hope that in the years to come, I will end up loving it. Loving what I choose to do. For when that time comes, I'll be like John.

And so now, one of those "life tests" is starting soon for me. Bring it on baby!

All about

: elise :

Jack (or is it Jane?) of all trades,
(almost!)

but Master of none.
(trying to!)

This is my paradise, where I indulge my senses grandiloquently.

A collective effort to keep family & friends updated, and for random strangers to pop by.

I wanted to put a HUGE picture of myself in this space, but being the technologically challenged person that I am, I can't figure out the mojo of it.

So I guess I'll just have to make do with scattering loads of random self-shots all over the blog!

: xoxo :

Hugs & Kisses

: xoxo :

: blabbers :

Gallery of

: memoirs :

Ending

: credits :

Inspired by:

JUICE & Undying Love

Edited by:

Yours Truly... Elise Tan