:: eLise is me ::: My Destiny.

Thursday, March 23, 2006

La vie est Belle <>

My Destiny.

In this lifetime, you are at a point in your soul development that requires you to do the work of refining and purifying your own nature. Like the ancient alchemists whose goal was to take bare materials and turn them into gold. Your own process of self-transformation involves taking what is crude or disordered in yourself and refining it. It is a cycle of separating the wheat from the chaff, requiring acute discrimination, rigorous self-analysis and self-criticism.

This impulse to perfect, to create order, and to focus on the flaws in order to improve and correct is the basis of much of your bahavior. When you project it out to the world, it manifests as extreme fastidiousness, meticulous attention to detail, the ability to do very fine and exacting work, precision of thought and expression, and sometimes a peculiar fussiness. You can be the critic, the razor-sharp analyst, the master craftsman with a reputation for the greatest finesse and polish.

You quietly observe, dissect, and measure everything against your own inner standard of perfection. Everything must be tested and go through the refiner's fire in order to prove its efficacy. Rarely do you swallow everything whole. Everything must be examined and judged, the acceptable parts ingested and the unacceptable rejected. This is true on many levels, including the physical. You are apt to be extremely discriminating about your diet, concerned with proper nutrition and the avoidance of pollutants and impurities in your food or environment, and so on. Your physical body itself may be very sensitive to what you take in - more so than other people. On an intellectual level, you are similarly discriminating, perhaps to the point of frank skepticism.

Because of your underlying need to create order, you like to categorize and put things in neat little boxes and you may deny, avoid, invalidate, or refuse to take seriously something that does not fit in to your scheme. Even in investigating the spiritual or mystical, you seek a system, an order. Ambiguity, multiplicity, chaos or disarray of any kind may vex you considerably. You can also be very critical and demanding of other people, in a nagging, petty way. This is if you are projecting your need to refine and perfect onto the outside world.

Ok. It is SO true.
People who know me well or has worked with me before, I'm sure you will agree.

I am at a point of getting in touch with the inner me or "soul". I'm into yoga, pilates, and spending quality time with myself (pampering myself DIY style).

I've stopped using vulgar language for so long that one time, I sprouted a vulgar in chinese and my pal went "Hey! I haven't heard you say that for so long!" And also, everyone will agree when I say that I'm a serious self-critic. Hence, getting myself into depression.

The need for perfection, well, I don't have to say much. All my clothes hangers have to be of the same color and design (Tailon has the 1st hand experience of what I'm talking about. haha.), or I'll freak, so what do you think?

it's obvious that I only uses 2 designs of clothes hangers (pink & red)

my clothes are arranged according to color (black, brown, green, blue, red & white)

And regarding being deemed as fussy by others, yes, I got that from my project mates.

Alright, I'll admit. I observe and measure almost everything according to an inner standard of mine. You people know it too. And my diet? I'm labelled a health nut!

And so my smoker friends out there, you people should now know why I'm so irritated with cigarette smoke and very anti-smoking. Back in secondary school, I used to have breathing problem when I breathe in cigarette smoke. So that's why I develop this perverse hatred towards smokers. And regarding the intellectual issue, my babe Jess will understand what I'm trying to say here.

Hmm. And speaking of my need to create order and organize stuffs, pictures speak a thousand words so I'll just leave you to your own conclusion.